A year ago at this time, I was sad. The previous September, I’d gotten out of a year-long “serious” relationship. By October, I found someone new, and fell extra hard on the rebound. Within three weeks, he told me he loved me; by December, things weren’t going well. By January, I knew it was over, but I was in denial because the chicken shit couldn’t just tell me to my face that he wanted to break up.
I went on a trip to Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. But I still thought about him, questioning what went wrong, foolishly blaming myself and thinking it would work if he would just stop walling me out.
During the night fireworks at Magic Kingdom, they play “When you Wish Upon a Star.” So I wished upon a star, and I bought myself a little Jiminy Cricket figurine to remind me.
A few months later, the light bulb clicked and Kevin and I began dating. My wish really did come true.
I don’t recommend focusing on the past, but if you bust out the bifocals once in awhile, you can learn a thing or two from it.
I looked back at Darren, and our whirlwind courtship, and I learned that when it’s right, you click, but it’s not a roller coaster of ups and downs. The real deal guy wouldn’t refuse to return my phone calls. My theme song for him, which was on the radio 24-7 as he was jerking me around: Hot N Cold by Katy Perry.
Weight loss? Quitting smoking? Bullshit.
Yes, it’s a new year, a new you, right? Whatever. It’s just one of those things we tell ourselves to make the Tough Choices easier.
Why should the start of a self-imposed calendar system decide your Fate? And that’s my attitude about New Year’s resolutions: don’t make one to break one.
Instead, I’m taking a look at 2009. I had an awesome year, but I wish I could see my friends more and have stronger relationships with them. I spent a lot of time wishing things would change so that we could hang out more often.
But it occurs to me that wishing won’t make it work this time. So my “resolution” is to call them more often, and to keep trying to hang out, even if it takes a bit of work.
I don’t need a cricket to tell me that.
Do you believe in New Year’s resolutions? If so, what are you resolving to change?