April 2009

090428_textYou wake up squinting and roll over. Confusion. Where am I? Suddenly you sit up – ouch! A rush of blood sends it spinning. Drymouth.

Ah, I remember now. That guy from last night. There he is, sleeping next to me. What the hell happened?

No, this didn’t happen to me. Well, not since college. Our phones didn’t send text messages back then, but if they did, I admit  some of them might have made this Web site:

Check it out:



Strap yourselves in. This one is a doozy. tool_tool_114882_tns

My friend “Superstar” goes on a match.com date with a guy last week. She agreed to meet him at Game 2 of the Hurricanes playoffs at the RBC Center.

She warned him ahead of time that she is absolutely terrified of heights. Like seriously, deathly, I’m-going-to-scream-cry-make-a-scene-I-can’t-handle-it afraid of heights. In other words, no nosebleed seats.

He is uncertain of the seat location, so they agree to play it by ear.

Segment One: Meet for drinks. Good idea. Might as well find out right off the bat if he’s hot or not, nice or a jerk.

The drink part is ok.  They talk, sip some wine. Ladies, always eat something before drinking two big glasses of wine during a first date. Superstar was a little tipsy and high on the guy’s hotness, which covered up his toolness during Segment One.

Tool Move No. 1: He asks if she can drive them to the RBC Center because his normal car (a BMW) is in the shop and he’s driving a van. (Read: his only car is a van, but he’s a liar.) He says she might find it creepy to ride in a van with him. If he wasn’t likely lying about the car thing, that might redeem the fact that he has a van. He ends up driving. (I say she should’ve followed him in her car.)

Tool Move. No. 2: He puts his hands on her during drinks. Hello? First date; let’s keep our hands to ourselves.

Segment Two: The game. They arrive and walk to the seats. Superstar doesn’t realize how high it is until they emerge from the hallway up in the nosebleed section, the rows of chairs laid out in front of her like rocks down the mountain. To her, it’s just as high, like she’s teetering on the edge of a cliff and could go at any moment. She begins to freak out and insists that she cannot make her way down the stairs to the seats. (more…)

When I leaned in to kiss him, I realized that maybe — just maybe — I had a crush on him after all.

I mean, I don’t usually kiss boys randomly while standing on the street. bulbs_concept_186253_tns

I’m laughing at myself right now. In my journal, these past few months I’ve written about my various dates and my friendship with Kevin. While I considered each date based on his merits, I consistently deny any interest in Kevin other than friendship, even after he asked me out.

But his name is mentioned a LOT. And not just in discussions of me hanging with him and my other friends in that group. I write about our flirtations, what I think of him (all positive) and whether or not I could date him. In the end, I always wrote something like, “eh, not really interested” or “what about our friendship?”

I think she doth she protest too much.  (more…)

hearthands_tnsSomething is in the air.

And it’s not just that annoying green/yellow pollen drenching my car in a thick coat and making us all sneeze.

It’s love.

Everywhere I go, someone is talking about love, sex and dating. At work, a woman is considering joining match.com. During softball practice, some of the guys were talking about recent developments with their crushes. Hanging out with girls, it’s all we talk about.

Maybe a young man’s fancy DOES lightly turn to thoughts of love this time of year.

You might chalk it up to my blog. People who know about it naturally enjoy discussing the finer points of dating with me.  Some of it’s could be attributed to own recent boy developments, which of course I’m excited about. I still owe you an explanation on all that – standby for entry soon.

While out with girls recently, I noticed that we talked of almost nothing else. Not about movies, books, our jobs – heck, I don’t even know what some of those girls do for a living.

I blog about love, sex and dating because I find the psychology and our actions around this behavior so fascinating. But, I feel like there’s something wrong with us when we can’t have a serious discussion about something aside from boys.

I’m not allergic to it, but I’m thinking I might be ready for summer.

Anyone else noticing this?



Bawdiness can be fun.

We women keep our sexuality under wraps most of the time. When hanging out with girlfriends, we might dispense some details in the name of bonding and curiosity.

When with a group of guys we might divulge for different reasons. Sometimes it can be fun to open up and admit, yes, we women like sex and seek it as much as men do. Doing so often gives you the “cool chick” label and puts you in the spotlight.

But in some cases, it’s like a flasher throwing open his trenchcoat – shocking, exciting and probably, a bit more than you wanted.

In a moment of Monday spontaneity, I agreed to meet a former coworker at Solas.

Those of you looking to find men might try Solas on a weeknight. Casual, no cover and a fair number of moderate- to hot-looking guys. Very few women, which means the competition pool is small. I definitely got several looks as I walked across the rooftop bar.

Too bad I spent most of the evening in the corner with two the least classy women I’ve ever met. (more…)

A friend forwarded this e-mail from her ex:tool_tool_114882_tns

I know this is out of the blue but you wouldn’t happen to know anyone with $5,707 to help me pay off my X-Terra to get it back from repossession would you.  I am grasping at straws here and am looking for any help I can find.  Do you have any liberal friends that happen to be millionaires and can spare the loot?  Any help would be appreciated…

OK, so I feel a tiny bit sorry for the guy because I don’t know him, but she says they dated for “like a minute,” that he was a loser and that she hasn’t heard from him in two years.

“To email me out of the blue like over 2 years after we dated for money- or from my friends??? That just takes major balls.”

Men to avoid: those in debt.

Share your tool stories – singlesuzanne@gmail.com.

It’s peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time!

Except it wasn’t. A new guy and I were at Panera Bread getting lunch. He had never been there and the menu didn’t appeal, so he ordered a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with potato chips.

I vowed never again to date a younger guy.

Don’t get me wrong – I love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. But at Panera? He was 19 to my 23. He was still in college; I was working at my first “real” job. To pay my bills, I’d picked up some shifts at the local Outback Steakhouse, which is where we met.

It was a two-week affair, riddled with examples of why dating a younger guy is nearly always a bad idea, including one very brief encounter in the bedroom that left both of us unsatisfied. The fact that it didn’t last long was the best part.

“It’s not the age; it’s the mileage.” Indiana Jones had a point, and I think it applies to young men, too. (I’d still do Harrison Ford; I don’t care if he’s 60.) (more…)

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